


The One with the Fashion Emergency

by loveneverwantedme



Category: Teen Wolf (TV) RPF
Genre: Fluff and Crack, Old Married Couple, colton is the group fashionista and it gives me endless joy, except I can totally see this convo going down with those two, fashion emergency, this is probably every tuesday tbh
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-28
Updated: 2015-07-28
Packaged: 2018-04-11 17:09:50
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,268
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4444781
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/loveneverwantedme/pseuds/loveneverwantedme
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In which Tyler Hoechlin cannot dress himself, Colton is appalled by his friend's lack of fashion sense, Hoechlin enjoys screwing with Colton just a little too much, and there is shameless flirting. So...basically a day in the life of our favorite dorks.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The One with the Fashion Emergency

**Author's Note:**

> So this is a ficlet that I wrote a while ago for a lovely lady on tumblr who I believe has now deactivated :'( Anywho I decided to post this on here for posterity which is a fancy way of saying that I think I'm really fucking funny. In case anyone cares, here is my post : http://loveneverwantedme.tumblr.com/post/112599983647/cutthissmilefromeartoear-loveneverwantedme
> 
> and the original post that started it: http://unicorn-farts-are-majestic.tumblr.com/post/110177138869/idk-why-but-this-makes-me-so-happy

 

Colton isn’t doing much of anything really, just lounging around in his pajamas, eating cereal and watching cartoons, a typical Saturday morning. So he doesn’t  _really_ mind the distraction when Hoech texts him, not that  _he_ needs to know that.

From: Hoechy Poo, 9:01 AM

You up?

To: Hoechy Poo, 9:03 AM

What do u want? I’m extremely busy

From: Hoechy Poo, 9:04 AM

911 Fashion Emergency!

Colton rolls his eyes. It’s way too early for this shit. He hasn’t even had a cup of coffee yet. He makes his way over to the kitchen, sensing that he’s going to need to be highly caffeinated for this. He pops a K-Cup into his overpriced monstrosity that can somehow only manage one cup of coffee at a time, and shoots another text.

To: Hoechy Poo, 9:07 AM

Ok calm down & let me see so I can assess the damage

Colton knows it’s got to be bad if Hoech is coming to him for help, knowing as he does that Colton will tease him mercilessly, but he isn’t prepared for the horrific atrocity that appears on his screen a moment later. Hoech is wearing burgundy skinny jeans which would be fine if it wasn’t for the ugliest sweater known to man that he paired with them. It needs to be burned. He’s also holding up two pairs of equally unattractive basketball shoes, neither of which even remotely go with the outfit. Not that Colton can imagine anything that would actually look good with that assault on the eyes.

From: Hoechy Poo, 9:13 AM

So…which shoes?

To: Hoechy Poo, 9:13 AM

BURN IT!!!

From: Hoechy Poo, 9:15 AM

What? The shoes? What’s wrong with them? :(

To: Hoechy Poo, 9:16 AM

Not the shoes! That hideous sweater. Where the hell did you even get that thing?

From: Hoechy Poo, 9:18 AM

Hey! I like this sweater. I bought it last time I was in NY

To: Hoechy Poo, 9:20 AM

Ok you are NOT allowed to go shopping by yourself anymore. Call me the next time you need new clothes bc I can’t let someone I’m associated with walk around looking like that

From: Hoechy Poo, 9:24 AM

You’re so mean. I can dress myself ok. Besides the lady in the store said it looked good on me so :P

To: Hoechy Poo, 9:25 AM

1\. I am the nicest person ever & u know it 

2\. Obviously u can’t or we wouldn’t be having this convo

3\. That lady is either a damn liar or blind

4\. BURN IT NOW

From: Hoechy Poo, 9:28 AM

No, I like it and I’m keeping it :P

To: Hoechy Poo, 9:29 AM

TYLER LEE HOECHLIN DO NOT MAKE ME COME OVER THERE

From: Hoechy Poo, 9:32 AM

You can try, but I won’t let you in :P

To: Hoechy Poo, 9:33 AM

I have a key to your place dumbass and stop overusing the emoticons it’s getting annoying

From: Hoechy Poo, 9:35 AM

Shit I knew I was gonna regret giving you that key

To: Hoechy Poo, 9:37 AM

Oh hush I know u live in hope that one day I will use that key for it’s intended purpose 

From: Hoechy Poo, 9:38 AM

And that would be?

To: Hoechy Poo, 9:39 AM

Booty calls, of course ;)

Hoechlin stares at his phone, blushing. He wasn’t sure how to respond to that. Damn Colton, he was doing this on purpose, probably laughing his ass off right now. Hoechlin knew it was a joke, but he still couldn’t help getting flustered whenever Colton made a quip like that. And the bastard knew it, got some sick pleasure from it. Hoechlin wasn’t exactly sure why they were friends at the moment.

Colton was laughing his ass off. His laughter got even more hysterical when Hoech’s next text came through. Tears sprang to his eyes and he laughed so hard he fell off the couch.

From: Hoechy Poo, 9:45 AM

Shut up

It took Colton a few minutes to pull himself together enough to respond.

To: Hoechy Poo, 10:02 AM

I love you Hoechy Poo

From: Hoechy Poo, 10:04 AM

I hate you. And don’t call me that

To: Hoechy Poo, 10:06 AM

Don’t worry I know that’s really code for “I love you too schnookums & please call me that all the time it gets me hot” ;)

From: Hoechy Poo, 10:09 AM

Schnookums??

To: Hoechy Poo, 10:13 AM

Yes, schnookums. It’s your super cute pet name for me <3 Not as original as Hoechy Poo but we all know I’m the brains behind this operation

From: Hoechy Poo, 10:15 AM

No pet names

To: Hoechy Poo, 10:16 AM

But they make me happy! What kind of pretend boyfriend r u? Robbing me of my happiness :’( No booty calls 4 u

From: Hoechy Poo, 10:19 AM

Will you stop with the booty calls already!

To: Hoechy Poo, 10:20 AM

Didn’t know I started ;)

From: Hoechy Poo, 10:22 AM

I give up you’re impossible

To: Hoechy Poo, 10:24 AM

Impossibly irresistible

From: Hoechy Poo, 10:25 AM

Shit I’m late! g2g

To: Hoechy Poo, 10:26 AM

Ah very convenient change of subject there. Plz tell me u at least changed the sweater

From: Hoechy Poo, 10:27 AM

Nope. I’m gonna wear it :P

To: Hoechy Poo, 10:28 AM

I am begging you DO NOT LEAVE THE HOUSE IN THAT THING

From: Hoechy Poo, 10:30 AM

That sounded more like an order

To: Hoechy Poo, 10:31 AM

whatever just srsly change the damn sweater

From: Hoechy Poo, 10:33 AM

Too late, walking out the house now :)

To: Hoechy Poo, 10:33 AM

UR LYING

To: Hoechy Poo, 10:33 AM

DONT U DARE

To: Hoechy Poo, 10:34 AM

IM COMING OVER RN STAY THERE

To: Hoechy Poo, 10:34 AM

I MEAN IT DONT MOVE DONT BREATHE

To: Hoechy Poo, 10:34 AM

I CANT LET U DO THIS

To: Hoechy Poo, 10:35 AM

THE HORROR

Hoechlin was literally rolling on the floor, tears streaming from his eyes. Oh payback was beautiful.

From: Hoechy Poo, 10:40 AM

Relax I changed it. I’m wearing the blue one you said brings out my eyes.

To: Hoechy Poo, 10:41 AM

ASSHOLE IM ALREADY ON MY WAY

To: Hoechy Poo, 10:42 AM

Really? Blue with burgundy pants?

Hoechlin rolls his eyes before reassuring Colton that he changed into the black pants.

From: Hoechy Poo, 10:45 AM

Fashion Nazi

From: Hoechy Poo, 10:46 AM

And you shouldn’t be texting while driving

To: Hoechy Poo, 10:47 AM

Pshh whatever u know ur lost w/o me. I honestly don’t know how u survived before u met me being so fashionably disabled

To: Hoechy Poo, 10:48 AM 

And I’m ignoring that last comment

From: Hoechy Poo, 10:50 AM 

Clearly

To: Hoechy Poo, 10:52 AM

Well, it’s ur fault I’m driving anyway. Besides I need photo evidence before I let u off the hook

From: Hoechy Poo, 10:55 AM

Seriously? You don’t believe me?

To: Hoechy Poo, 10:56 AM

Just send it 

Hoechlin really didn’t have to take this shit. He was a grown man dammit! He sent the picture.

To: Hoechy Poo, 11:03 AM

Ooo see your ass looks way better in those pants

Hoechlin thunked his head against the wall. Why did he even bother?


End file.
